Brilliantly Living

Sharing the brilliant and challenging moments that makeup life.  From motherhood to marriage and everything in between.

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  • Bri Westhaver

Rule of Three

Updated: Mar 8, 2021

Is this you? This is what I feel like at least 10x per day. Pause, breathe, remember this will pass, but in my mind, I'm thinking about all the things I haven't done. In fact, I'm sitting up here in my bedroom at 9 o'clock at night pretending that my living room isn't a disaster and there aren't 2 loads of dishes to do, secretly wishing the cleaning fairy will make an appearance while I write this post. Can you relate? Now I don't proclaim to be a master by any means at getting s#it done but I'd consider myself a high performer. I have 3 kids under 5, I work a full-time 9-5 job and run a business full time. Sometimes I even like to throw in some fun or you know breathing in there. Here's the thing though, for us high performers, sometimes the ease and satisfaction in life gets lost. Some days it's 9PM and I haven't even drank water or paused to smell the roses. Some days I get so worried about the piles of laundry and dishes that I can't even be present with my kids. Then there are days like this where they are lovingly watching the snowfall out the window while me, the high performer, get s#it done Mom, pauses to watch with them.

Want the solution to all your problems? ok well not really, but how about we make this a little fun. I have a rule of 3, funny enough when I went to google this I found it was actually a thing.

According to Wikipedia "The rule of three can refer to a collection of three words, phrases, sentences, lines, paragraphs/stanzas, chapters/sections of writing and even whole books.[2][4] The three elements together are known as a triad.[5] The technique is used not just in prose, but also in poetry, oral storytelling, films, and advertising. Let's look at this from Goldilocks point of view, since I just read that book to Abi a few days ago. "The story of Goldilocks and the Three Bears uses the rule of three extensively, with the protagonist examining three sets of three items in a house, finding only the third of each set to be satisfactory"

I've been using this rule of 3 for about a year now and it makes a huge difference and interestingly enough, using Wikipedia's reference to Goldilocks, I often find the third item in my rule to be the most satisfactory. Here's how I play the game, every day I pick 3 things I want to accomplish, only 3. For my high-performing brain, I have to stop and tell myself to not try so hard, for my heart and sanity the rule of 3 allows me to snuggle with my kids and read them stories. Today, for instance, I picked three things I would accomplish. 1. ROCK my cooking class and contribute to the guests 2. Spend an hour with the girls at bedtime (stories, bath etc)

3. Write a blog post (hence why the dishes sit downstairs)

Do my dishes need to be done? Yep! Are there at least 5 loads of laundry to be done? Probably more! Is my living room clean? Nope Am I satisfied? YES! One thing I'm discovering in this game is the power of pausing, the power of not having to be a high performer all the time. For sure being a high performer produces results and I get kick-a$$ results in my business and life but there's always a cost to that, the cost of truly being proud and satisfied with myself, the cost of missing the little moments like these when I'm too busy trying to get stuff done.

The dishes can wait (or John will do them 🤣) the laundry will get done eventually but my kids will only be small once.

I invite you to play the game with me, 3 things a day - just 3 and GO FOR IT! Guess what, if you don't do anything that's ok too - you still rock!

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